说实话,写得太差了,都很费解,很中文化的文章,我英语专业的,帮你修改下,有不足请指出:(我把时态全改成过去时态,不然看着闹心)
Winter holiday（不出去玩用什么vacation,放假就是holiday,不用刻意追求用词新颖）came(is coming指要来了,你既然要表达终于来了的意思用一般过去时就可以) finally/at last.（修饰副词放放句末更加English,放句中很不地道,好像中文直译成英语）.I was very happy,because I got many red packets.Do you know why(从句用陈述语气不用do,不然动词重复)I like winter holiday?Let me tell you:
On New Year's Eve,my parents and I had(reunion这词给你砍了,词不能查到了就用ok?首先这词给人的感觉就是你家庭遭到不幸破裂然后又重聚,用在这太晦气,然后是你句末有用together就可以,不然重复,family dinner我知道你的意思是要表达全家团圆饭但是英语里不会这么说)dinner together.In the feast,（我冒昧的给你加了句,表达的是晚饭很丰盛的意思）we ate New Year's cake,sweet dumplings,eight treasures rice pudding and many other courses(给你改成很多其他的菜,不知道你是不是要表达这意思,还有这些专用名次我不知道对不对).They were very delicious.After dinner,we watched live programme about Spring Festival Gala in the evening（改的面目全非,你自己琢磨琢磨）.In the midnight,my friends and I went to the open air to lit（你拿个烟火当球打?） fireworks（这个是总称,包括五颜六色的,你写得那个只会彭~啪的好吧）.The flame of the fireworks（对,焰火很好看,光看就很好看,包装的多好啊,放地上看看都很满足了） was very brilliant（送你个好词）.
It was a colourful and rich winter holiday.I had a good time.
大汗淋漓,改完才发现你太有才了,以后别查到个好词就搬上去,this is the point.其他细节你以后慢慢体会吧,还年轻~慢慢来
