At work, at home and in our social circles, we carry with us a sense of our own personal space that we often unconsciously protect. Probably the most readily thought-of personal space is that which physically, although invisibly, surrounds us. You’ve probably felt what it’s like to have someone “in your space” – it’s uncomfortable and you may take a step or two back to regain the physical distance you need to be comfortable again. Personal space also includes specific physical areas that extend beyond our invisible space. These tend to be spaces that we qualify as “mine” even if we don’t own them: “my work cubicle,” “my desk,” or “my parking space.” At work, don’t go through their desk drawers looking for a pen, don’t take their pad of sticky notes because you see they have two on their desk, and when parking your vehicle, park in the center of “your” spot so that your neighbour can easily open her car door in “her” spot. Another invisible personal space, or perhaps this is an invasion of personal space, is the sound that enters into it. Talking loudly on the cell phone, ear-splitting, cackling laughter in the otherwise quiet restaurant, or a neighbour’s blaring stereo are all types of aural assaults on personal space. Hearing unwanted noise makes what could have been a good time into one that is stressful, frustrating, and not at all enjoyable. Respect that the other people on the bus don’t want to hear your cell phone conversation.
While we tend to focus on getting along with others through good social skills that revolve around what we say and how we act, there are many contributing factors that encourage good interpersonal relationships but are perhaps less conspicuous. In this case, it’s simply a matter of paying more attention to the personal space of those around us and being considerate of how our actions may be intrusive.
